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Write three sentences. Let's see where the story takes us.

Why did I agree to meet him in the hotel all alone, even though he seemed really nice online? I kick myself knowing I should have come here with someone else; Lola did offer. I take off my jacket and try to make myself comfortable on the bed...
Fullstop.
It was then when I realized I had forgotten to shave my muff. I became uneasy at thought of how he might react to seeing the amazonian jungle I had laying beneath my prized Garfield knickers. It was then I realized I had brought a razor with me, but I wasn't sure if I had time to mow down the monster that lay beneath.
A sudden race to the bathroom became paramount. A midst complains from my lover, to the bathroom I ran. I pulled down my knickers and readied my mind and soul to battle against the amazonian bush, the omnipresent wall standing in the way of my sexual satisfaction.
Love the life you live, Live the life you love
Wait,why wasn't my abnormally blunt thumb penetrating properly?! I wiggled my fingers vigorously through the excess skin and pulled out a string, much to my surprise, which appeared to be attached to a rolled up piece of paper; slightly wet might I add. Unfolding the paper, I began to read with immense curiosity.
Fullstop.
The heart, it raced with such anticipation. The paper being so delicate due to its exposure to such a moist environment had to be dealt with very carefully. At first glace upon this soaked piece of parchment I found that it was a treasure map.
I FUGGIN LUB PEETSAH BUT I DON'T LIKE MAH VAJINAL DISCHARJ TASTING OB PEETSAH WATE A SEK I DONT EBEN HAB A VAJINA.
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Wiping away that pungent pussy smelling discharge, I came up with an idea based on the movie I watched with my girlfriends just last week, during our weekly orgy. What if I recreated the human centipede scene with this guy I'm supposed to be meeting and perhaps as a centipede we can go hunt for the hidden treasure together? I squat above a mirror and spread my butt-cheeks as wide as possible to find a tentacle hanging out of my bleached anus; I thought I tucked it in well but evidently I was wrong.
Fullstop.
THAY YOOSED TO CORL ME A BEECHED-WHALE AT SKOOL BUT NOW I GESS I AM A BEECHED-AYNOOSE

AND INSIDE MY ASSWHOLE WAZ ONLEE 2 TENTAKOOLZ LEFT

SO I POOLED THEM OWTE AND BUTT-WARKED ON MY ASS TO THA TREE WHER THA TRESHER WAZ BEREED
Last update on April 14, 9:09 am by koolie.
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